William & Kate: The Happy Couple
So, the Royal Wedding is upon us and I can definitely say, without fear of understating myself, that I do not give a shit.
For way too long, the media has been full of “William and Kate” this and “William and Kate” that and it’s gotten to the point where every time I hear another mention of it, I feel an overwhelming urge to punch someone.
Periodically, the media do this to us. They thrust stories upon us that they have deemed should be high in the minds of everyone in the country. Now, I don’t necessarily have an issue with this when they are talking about nuclear disasters in the far east or politics in the United States. Hell, I don’t even mind when they start on about the tedium of random events in the UK. But what I do object to is the emphasis placed upon the tabloid gossip and their child-like obsession with celebrity.
And for someone like me, who lost all respect and faith in the British Royal family many years ago, this extension of sycophantic celebrity obsession brings a whole new raft of misery to my already bleak existence.
This particular episode of Royal arse-licking annoys me for some very specific reasons. First, it’s timing.
Am I really being overly cynical in suggesting that this holy union is only taking place at all to take our minds off all of the other depressing crap in the country (and the world) right now?
I find the very concept of the upper echelons of the government and/or the Royal Family getting together and deciding that the mindless minions that make up the population of this country need a distraction from the shit they are dealing us on a daily basis offensive in the extreme. The assumption that we are all just proles that can be tricked and manipulated at will by the simplest of means is annoying, but doing so during this time of scandals, excessive rises in taxation and a host of other political issues that really deserve and need our attention is plain wrong.
Even an argument that the whole operation is an exercise in raising the country’s morale is rather sickening in it’s manipulative intent.
Of course, what’s more sickening is that, for a huge percentage of the population, it’s fucking working – mainly because the general public are too stupid to see that they’re being manipulated at all.
Yes, let’s not think about the general lack of money, the failing economy, the rising taxes, the shambles of a coalition government and the liberties they are taking with our personal freedoms, the earthquakes destroying the planet or even the nuclear fallout spreading across the entire eastern world! Some random toff is getting married! Let’s party!
Not to mention that it’s given the chav element of society an excuse to dust off their Saint George flags and start waving them in the faces of everyone they meet. Don’t get me wrong on this – I have no issue with patriotism. What I do have an issue with is these people that sponge off of this country’s resources all year long, never working a day in their lives and spending half of their time committing some crime or other … only to start prancing about brandishing a flag when some insignificant event such as a football match or a stranger’s wedding is taking place.
Hanging a flag out of your window for 7 days every 4 years is NOT patriotism. It’s hypocrisy. Only you can’t see that because you don’t know what hypocrisy is.
Finally, one more example of my suicidally cynical view of human existence! Are any of us actually convinced that Catherine Middleton has any real interest in William?!
She is an incredibly pretty, sexy woman … and she is marrying a goofy-looking, balding ginge! Yeah, she’s TOTALLY in love(!) I’m sure it’s absolutely nothing to do with becoming an instant millionaire nor the ability to forgo every single day’s work she might have had to do in her entire life. And CERTAINLY not anything to do with being a dead cert to become the fucking queen!
Without his status and his money, she would never have given him a second look. Put simply, she is way out of his league.
Of course, the same could be said of William’s father, Charles and Kate’s relative (albeit distant), Diana! I suppose, this time round we can all hold out a dismal hope that even one of them can remain faithful!
I’ll be spending this friday away. Far from my tv and with the radio off. Probably lying on a beach, reading a book. Unfortunately, I will be in the minority as countless morons line the streets of London or sit staring at their tv to witness this so called landmark event in British history.
As far as I’m concerned, they can jam their sycophantic, obsessive coverage right up their arse.
MisterShouty 