Curb Your Enthusiasm
Ten years ago, when comedy genius Larry David wrote the first season of the brilliant TV show, “Curb Your Enthusiasm”, that phrase was aimed directly at those people in our lives that are just constantly chipper and upbeat. People that grin constantly and talk about how great it is to be alive. Well, thanks for the pep talk, asshole, but let me lay a reality check on you.
Life, for everyone in this world, is a struggle. For some, it’s a struggle to have enough food to feed their family. For some, it’s a struggle to get that report handed in to the boss on time. For you, it’s a struggle to force yourself into thinking about anyone but yourself. You fill your life with the meaningless tripe and minutia of everyday existance, totally oblivious to the real, sobering events around you and all over the world.
But that’s not important because you have a funky new hat and have just got your nails done!
Every last bit of their severely limited brain power is trained upon obsessing over the mindless shite in tabloids – and of course, the bastard child of the tabloid – the glossy gossip magazine. Shelf-Litter. Soft porn for the truly stupid of society.
They need to wake up and realize that the world does not revolve around them. That there are in fact only two people on this planet that believe it does: them and their fucking mother!
Why is it that when people that see life for what it is – a miserable, endless, uncompromizing string of crushing disappointments, followed after an all-too-long wait, by the welcome release of death – are treated for depression while the terminally fucking cheerful are left to go on their overly merry way, completly oblivious to their surroundings and events unfolding across this world? These people are way more sick than the so-called “depressed” among us. The amazing irony of it is that people “suffering with depression” are given valium or some other such drug that makes THEM not give a shit about anything either!
Do I really have to state that his self centred, blinkered view of the world is NOT something to envy? Or to fucking promote?
Are there really more people out there that believe that nothing matters if it’s not directly related to them?
Well, that’s just great, but don’t you think you should at least spare one of your very few thoughts for the tens of thousands living in misery in the wake of recent earthquakes? Or do you truly believe that Jordan’s latest money-spinning lie about her sex life is actually more important than any of them?
You may argue that these meaningless events in the lives of the non-celebrities over which you obsess are merely distractions from the real world events that actually DO matter … and you are fully aware of the things that actually do affect the lives of the people around you. The thing is, I’ve simply never seen any evidence that this is the case. And I have looked! Really looked!
But all I see is the vacant, mindless stare coming from behind those dead eyes. Those dead eyes that only ever come to life when the fucking X Factor is on the TV or the press are peddling a new distraction from your obsession with the sex lives of footballers posessing heads that resemble vegetables.
Well, I suppose all we can really do (after we’ve had a good long moan) is leave them to to their fantasy in the belief that when they finally come crashing down to earth, they will fall harder and further than any of us normal people. And we can hope that as they reach for the light switch in the newly dark and depressing basement of their minds, the boney, calloused hand of the figurative retarded step-sister chained down there will drag them kicking and screaming by their hair into an endless well of depression from which no amounts of drugs will ever be able to retrieve them.
MisterShouty 